One of the newest additions to the Studio is the hit movie-inspired Men In Black: Alien Attack, and it's one of a growing genre of attractions that blend interactive game elements with a ride-through format.

	The setup: MiB Headquarters has opened its doors to visitors interested in training for the top-secret program. Applicants receive their pre-training pep talk by Will Smith and Rip Torn (in their MiB agent personas, of course).

Clearly the twins have their hands full as they monitor all alien activity on Earth AND input the IDs and test scores of all new MiB trainees.

After the briefing, visiting applicants queue downstairs to the training course -- a simulated city overrun by alien bugs and baddies of all shapes and dimensions (literally!).  To add a bit of sporting camaraderie to the test, trainees are grouped onto test vehicles which contain test weaponry as well as propel guests through the course -- and the double-track layout means two car teams compete against each other on the target practice training run.

Naturally the aliens and MiB technology are highly classified, so I cannot publish pictures taken inside the test center, lest all etixland's readers suddenly "disappear" for knowing too much.  You'll have to sign up for the training program yourself to experience it completely.

Riders progress through various city blocks in which a wacky array of aliens dwell, hide and spring out at passing cars.  These space oddities interact with both the vehicles and the individual trainees, reacting in sound and motion when they're hit with harmless light guns. But don't let your aim falter, because some of the more aggressive species fire back at you if not subdued in time, their laser blasts sending guests' cars spinning madly for several feet and making it that much harder to complete your target training.  The payoff of this intergalactic shooting gallery arrives when a gigantic alien monster crouches over the course exit, and trainees must engage in rapid fire battle to save their own skins.

As trainees finish their ride, another "coach" alien growls its positive or negative post-course wrap up and offers congratulations or a new game plan for your next visit.  A final MiB video monitor awaits the two cars, displaying each team's total score on the course, accompanied by Will Smith's expert-agent opinion on the teams' performance -- score high and he 'ad-libs' various compliments on your readiness to join the MiB agency, but score poorly and Will berates you with good-natured trash talk.  

Next time I try out for the MiB team, I'll attempt to sneak a few more pictures from inside -- for now, I'll end with a shot of this humorous, stylistically incongruous signage display at the ride's exit.  The lighting was a bit dim, the shot a bit hasty, so in case you can't read it all, the sign gleefully boasts: "Are we alone?  Of course we are!  The universe is yours . . . make it a happy one!"  It's a humorous mix of 50s/60s pop culture kitsch -- supposedly the era in which the MiB agency began -- and deliriously misplaced optimism about humanity's superiority in the galaxy.  Is this an archived piece of human naiveté meant to entertain alien-jaded agents, or a graphical version of the MiB neuralizer, a seemingly harmless touch of brain-erasing propaganda to convince exiting trainees that aliens don't really exist?  Does anyone even notice this sign as they leave the ride?  I don't know, I just wanted to include all the photos I took in the show.

For now, the fun and games are over -- next we literally take a stand against a very real and earthbound force of danger and destruction.

© 2001-2002 scott weitz